Core Values vs Core Beliefs
You’ve probably heard both of these terms colloquially already, but what do they really mean and how can knowing the difference between them improve your mental health? Let’s get right into it.
Core Beliefs
The concept of Core Beliefs in the psychological sense is used most commonly in Cognitive-Behavioural Therapy (CBT), which is an evidence-based treatment for various mental health issues, including but not limited to depression and anxiety.
Core Beliefs are your innermost fundamental beliefs about yourself, other people, and the world/life in general.
For someone with mental health concerns, these beliefs can be very rigid and riddled with cognitive distortions, such as: I’ll never be good enough, or Everyone hates me, or The world only exists to cause me pain.
What Exactly Are Cognitive Distortions?
Similar in a sense to logical fallacies, cognitive distortions are errors in thinking that result in skewed beliefs, often holding people back from living fulfilling lives.
Common Types of Cognitive Distortions
Black and White/All or Nothing/Polarised ThinkingSeeing people, things, or situations as only one thing or the other, without considering that almost everything lies on a spectrum/continuum.
Example: “My partner still hasn’t said they love me. They must just be using me and probably don’t even like me.”
Example: “My partner still hasn’t said they love me. They must just be using me and probably don’t even like me.”
BlamingUnfairly blaming others or external factors in situations where you also hold at least some responsibility or accountability.
Example: “It’s not my fault I cheated – they should have been a better partner.”
Example: “It’s not my fault I cheated – they should have been a better partner.”
CatastrophisingExpecting the worst possible outcomes to situations and blowing things out of proportion.
Example: “My boss didn’t greet me back this morning. I wonder if I’ve done something wrong or made a terrible mistake in my work. I’m sure it’s just a matter of time before they call me in to fire me.”
Example: “My boss didn’t greet me back this morning. I wonder if I’ve done something wrong or made a terrible mistake in my work. I’m sure it’s just a matter of time before they call me in to fire me.”
Emotional ReasoningReacting to situations based on your feelings before checking the facts.
Example: “My partner’s texting other people, so they must be cheating on me, just like my ex.”
Example: “My partner’s texting other people, so they must be cheating on me, just like my ex.”
Excessive Should/Must LanguageCreating excessive demands on yourself by thinking you “should” or “must” do certain things or behave a certain way (remember the continuum/spectrum of life – this doesn’t mean never use these words and abandon all obligations).
Example: “I can’t believe I missed gym today. I should be going every day. I’m such a failure.”
Example: “I can’t believe I missed gym today. I should be going every day. I’m such a failure.”
Fallacy of ChangeBelieving you can change those around you into who you want them to be without realising that the resentment caused by this will erode your relationships. Making someone change against their will never truly goes well – they need to genuinely want that change.
Example: “The issue is that my partner doesn’t listen to me when I tell them what to do. If they would just do what I say, everything would be perfect.”
Example: “The issue is that my partner doesn’t listen to me when I tell them what to do. If they would just do what I say, everything would be perfect.”
Fallacy of ControlEither under- or over-estimating the control you have over a situation/life in general. These are two extremes of the same continuum, and of course healthy thinking involves a balance – appropriately assessing both internal and external factors.
Example: “It’s not my fault that everything’s gone wrong in my life – I didn’t choose to be born. Anyway, I’m too old now to do anything about it,” or “It’s my fault my parents got divorced. They would still be happily married if I hadn’t been born.”
Example: “It’s not my fault that everything’s gone wrong in my life – I didn’t choose to be born. Anyway, I’m too old now to do anything about it,” or “It’s my fault my parents got divorced. They would still be happily married if I hadn’t been born.”
Fallacy of FairnessBelieving that everything in life must surely work out to be fair in the end. Life just doesn’t always work that way, and while I advocate always fighting for what’s fair, expecting it will sometimes just disappoint you. This is different from being optimistic in a healthy sense, which is hoping for the best while planning for the worst.
Example: “If you’re innocent then you shouldn’t need a lawyer. Everything happens for a reason and justice will prevail; you’ll see.”
Example: “If you’re innocent then you shouldn’t need a lawyer. Everything happens for a reason and justice will prevail; you’ll see.”
Fear of Being Wrong/Need to Always Be RightHaving an obsessive need to be right no matter what, and going to great lengths to avoid being wrong or corrected.
Example: “I don’t care what Google supposedly says; I know this for a fact and you just can’t admit I’m right.”
Example: “I don’t care what Google supposedly says; I know this for a fact and you just can’t admit I’m right.”
Fortune TellingThinking you can predict the future based on what you believe and your life experiences.
Example: “I know I have this job interview tomorrow, but they’re not going to hire me anyway, so what’s the point of going?”
Example: “I know I have this job interview tomorrow, but they’re not going to hire me anyway, so what’s the point of going?”
Heaven’s Reward FallacyBelieving that if you just put enough effort into something/someone, everything will work out the way you hope. I also call this the Fairytale Ending Fallacy – where someone goes through sacrifice and hardship, overcoming obstacles, and gets the happy ending. This, of course, is not guaranteed in real life, and your efforts and sacrifice may be in vain or even harmful if you’re aiming them in unhealthy directions.
Example: “I deserved to win that competition – I put more on the line than anyone else and more time, as well.”
Example: “I deserved to win that competition – I put more on the line than anyone else and more time, as well.”
Labelling and OvergeneralisationMaking overarching generalisations and rigid assumptions once a person/thing/situation/experience is labelled without seeing them as more than one-dimensional.
Example: “I know you’re Chinese, but don’t worry, I see you as White.”
Example: “I know you’re Chinese, but don’t worry, I see you as White.”
Magnification and MinimisationSeeing others’ positive traits as emphatically good while seeing your own positive traits as neutral/negative/not as good.
Example: “Alex is basically perfect – so intelligent, kind, funny… I’ll never be good enough for them.”
Example: “Alex is basically perfect – so intelligent, kind, funny… I’ll never be good enough for them.”
Mental FilteringMinimising the positive and considering situations through a negative and self-deprecating lens.
Example: “I finished the race but I didn’t win! I only came 5th, which is basically as bad as having come in last place at 835th. Ugh, I suck at this.”
Example: “I finished the race but I didn’t win! I only came 5th, which is basically as bad as having come in last place at 835th. Ugh, I suck at this.”
Mind ReadingAssuming you know what other people are thinking.
Example: “I bet Sam thinks I’m a clumsy idiot after seeing me fall in the parking lot yesterday.”
Example: “I bet Sam thinks I’m a clumsy idiot after seeing me fall in the parking lot yesterday.”
PersonalisationTaking things personally or assuming people’s behaviour is a result of something you’ve done.
Example: “I messaged my friend an hour ago and they still haven’t replied. They’re obviously upset with me.”
Example: “I messaged my friend an hour ago and they still haven’t replied. They’re obviously upset with me.”
What Causes Cognitive Distortions?
Cognitive distortions are often a product of one’s formative years, when weintroject
“good” and “bad” emotional objects indiscriminately from those around us and the experiences we have. Which parts are actually part of your identity and which parts are distorted echoes from the past?
Like internalising, but moreso. See the References section below for more info (Kleinian Object Relations Theory).
Really think about it. Who were the people around you growing up and what were their expectations and judgements of you? Part of personal growth is realising that, as a child, you naturally had no frames of reference or filters for what to take in – you just took it all in at face value, without truly understanding why or how much of it reflected specific people or experiences.
For example, as I always say, if you’re born into a cannibal tribe, you’ll grow up thinking it’s normal to eat people.
A lot of mental suffering can come from not untangling all of these internal emotional objects and figuring out what’s really you and what’s a squatter from the past pretending to be part of you.
So how do you deal with distorted beliefs you’ve always assumed to be true? Obviously, I recommend therapy for this as it can be quite jarring to question your world view and really think about where your Core Beliefs came from. In a general sense though, the path to healthier Core Beliefs involves a growth mindset (more on that soon), psychological flexibility, critical thinking skills, and Core Values.
For example, as I always say, if you’re born into a cannibal tribe, you’ll grow up thinking it’s normal to eat people.
A lot of mental suffering can come from not untangling all of these internal emotional objects and figuring out what’s really you and what’s a squatter from the past pretending to be part of you.
So how do you deal with distorted beliefs you’ve always assumed to be true? Obviously, I recommend therapy for this as it can be quite jarring to question your world view and really think about where your Core Beliefs came from. In a general sense though, the path to healthier Core Beliefs involves a growth mindset (more on that soon), psychological flexibility, critical thinking skills, and Core Values.
Core Values
It may seem obvious what Core Values are, but many people go through life without actually articulating them. That’s all well and good when someone is in the peak of mental health and life is going great.
When life gets difficult, however, inner conflicts can arise between one’s Core Values and Core Beliefs, and even between different Core Values themselves, resulting in psychological discomfort and ambivalence.
When life gets difficult, however, inner conflicts can arise between one’s Core Values and Core Beliefs, and even between different Core Values themselves, resulting in psychological discomfort and ambivalence.
Core Values are the guiding principles by which you live your life and discern good from bad; and important from unimportant.
Please remember that Core Values in and of themselves are neutral, in that it’s not “bad” to value (haha) certain Values over others. Everyone’s Core Values are different – that’s okay.
Having said that, how you go about achieving your Values can be healthy or unhealthy (think Stalin, Hitler, etc.), and this is largely influenced by your Core Beliefs. Also, Core Values aren’t necessarily static – they can change over time (and typically do as one ages).
Knowing what your most important Core Values are today can help you gain a better understanding of yourself and why you are who you are, and sometimes even why you hold some of the Core Beliefs you do based on your life experiences.
Having said that, how you go about achieving your Values can be healthy or unhealthy (think Stalin, Hitler, etc.), and this is largely influenced by your Core Beliefs. Also, Core Values aren’t necessarily static – they can change over time (and typically do as one ages).
Knowing what your most important Core Values are today can help you gain a better understanding of yourself and why you are who you are, and sometimes even why you hold some of the Core Beliefs you do based on your life experiences.
Free Core Values Checker
There are several core values resources you can find online, but they’re typically just lists and either have too many values with some being redundant, or too few values without the ability for you to add your own.
The ones I’ve found that are interactive make you compare almost every Value with every other Value before giving you the results, which are still typically inaccurate.
So, I’ve made a free Core Values Checker that lets you add additional Values of your own if you want to and helps you determine which are most important to you, while giving you full control over your choices. It also has some questions for you to consider at the end that can potentially expand your self-insight.
The ones I’ve found that are interactive make you compare almost every Value with every other Value before giving you the results, which are still typically inaccurate.
So, I’ve made a free Core Values Checker that lets you add additional Values of your own if you want to and helps you determine which are most important to you, while giving you full control over your choices. It also has some questions for you to consider at the end that can potentially expand your self-insight.
Submit the form below to receive your own private copy of the Core Values Checker:
Here’s a preview of the Core Values Checker in Action:
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If you live in Alberta, Canada, and would like to know more about handling conflicts between your Core Beliefs, Core Values, and current circumstances, I’m a few clicks and some typing away.